What You Are Worth
by Namaguza Bouzu
Summary: COMPLETE.  The kappa is confused about his feelings for the bouzu.  The bouzu is confused about the kappa's intentions.
1. Chapter 1

**Title**: What You Are Worth – Chapter 1  
******Author**: Namaguza Bouzu  
**Pairing**: Gojyo x Sanzo  
**Rating**: T  
**Warning/s**: OOC. Rating will go up for future chapters. If you are not ready for future NC-17, skip this. Otherwise, step right in.  
**Disclaimer**: Saiyuki is Minekura's.  
**Notes**: None for now.

_

* * *

_

It was then when he knew for sure what he meant to the kappa, and surprisingly, what the kappa meant to him. He suddenly understood everything the kappa had said in that tavern. He was tired of running away from it. He was an idiot for realizing it too late.

__

_

* * *

_

It was another pothole on the road that woke Gojyo up from his deep stupor. They have been on the road for three consecutive days and everyone was just hoping to get to the nearest town as soon as possible. None of them got much rest when they had to rough it out. Gojyo looked around to see that they were still in the same damn path they've been on before he fell asleep. He was so bored he wanted to annoy the saru just for entertainment but he was too lazy to do even that. He vaguely remembered that his dream was composed of scenes of gold and violet.

The heat of the sun was definitely affecting Gojyo's brain. He had been doing it a lot this past week and he was at it again – staring at Sanzo through the jeep's side mirror. Whenever he watched, it never ceased to amaze him how those little lines on Sanzo's forehead would disappear whenever he drifted off to sleep. The monk also unconsciously played with his hair when he had nothing else to do. There were times when he wondered if it was as soft as it looks. He silently cursed at himself for failing to hide the blush staining his cheek when Sanzo returned his stare and raised one perfect eyebrow. He quickly averted his eyes and to his surprise, the monk did not say anything.

He would not deny the fact that one look at Sanzo was all he needed to say that the blonde is very attractive. Hell, he thought so the minute he saw him, until he opened his mouth and demonstrated his talent in cussing that would put the devil to shame. Plus, Gojyo just did not find dudes attractive. It was not in his personal bible. He did not usually think about them at all, that's why he just can't wrap his finger around why lately, he had been feeling this need to be closer to the monk, especially during battles. He was sometimes so aware of Sanzo's presence that he always knew when he needed to cover the monk's back so that he could reload his gun. He will blame it on the heat. And right now, the wind, which was currently wafting the smell of the blonde's vanilla shampoo right his way.

* * *

The rain had been pouring down since they ran to the inn they found that afternoon for shelter. Not one of them had the energy to stroll around town and check out what it had to offer so they agreed to eat in the inn's diner. All of them did except for Sanzo. Of course, the monk would be found in his room, staring outside the window, talking to no one and eating nothing. During these times, he was best left to his thoughts alone.

Hakkai had tried to coax him out and into the dining room twice before he gave up and sent Goku who also returned with no Sanzo. The kappa should not have cared at all. It was just the pissy monk being himself when it rained but he deliberately ordered extra food so he could bring some to Sanzo's room later.

He knocked on the door to Sanzo's room and as expected, got no response. Did he take that as a sign to buzz off? Of course not. So he used the key he got from the cute receptionist at the lobby and went right in.

"Get out," the monk said quietly.

Gojyo ignored him, placing his offerings on the small table beside the bed. "Dinner, Your Majesty." Gojyo noticed that Sanzo was still by the window, smoking, and still in his wet clothes looking like a drenched rat.

"I said get out." The monk was too tired to give the kappa some decent beating for barging in on his privacy but too depressed to talk to anyone, especially the kappa.

"Hey, I just figured you need to eat now because you haven't eaten much during lunch either…" Why did he even notice that?

"Who the fuck are you to tell me what to do?" Sanzo finally faced him and stared at him coldly.

"I'm the sexy, long-legged Sha Gojyo and I'm just trying to help, man." Gojyo used to leave Sanzo alone when it was raining. He knew he wouldn't get anything from the monk. It puzzled him why he is bothering to go through this abuse from the monk now just to get him to eat something.

"Do you really have a death wish?" Sanzo's patience was wearing thin.

"Well, since you still need me, at least for the fucking mission, I wouldn't be worried about that." Gojyo said, giving the monk a gloating leer.

As the kappa thought his day could not get any worse, the monk stood up and left, but not before delivering his final line.

"I do not, and would never, need anything from a worthless kappa bastard like you."


	2. Chapter 2

**Title**: What You Are Worth – Chapter 2  
**Author**: namaguza_bouzu  
**Pairing**: Gojyo x Sanzo  
**Rating**: T  
**Warning/s**: OOC. Rating will go up for future chapters. If you are not ready for future NC-17, skip this. Otherwise, step right in.  
**Disclaimer**: Saiyuki is Minekura's.  
**Notes**: Not much interaction between 5 and 3 here. This chapter is to put some things into order.

* * *

That stung. Gojyo grew up hearing people talk, not even bothering to do it behind his back, about how big a mistake his existence was. How he was not wanted. If it wasn't coming from his mother, he didn't really give a shit about what they were saying. He raised his middle finger to anyone and everyone who tried to put him down.

But coming from Sanzo, he realized he did give a shit. And hell, it fucking stung. Even after three years of being on the road with him, he did not expect the monk to treat him with favor. Sanzo was an ass to him, no pun intended, as he was to everyone else. This was exactly the reason why he always tried to push the monk to the brink of insanity daily. With Sanzo, he always wanted more. He was not satisfied with the usual indifference Sanzo directed to him. A rush of excitement always comes to him whenever he had all of Sanzo's attention.

_"I do not, and would never, need anything from a kappa bastard like you."_

How he wished those words were not directed to him. He would have liked it much better if Sanzo had punched him in the face, kicked him in the gut, or slammed the fucking fan on him until his head went numb. Anything would have been better than this shit because he just realized that somewhere between the start of this journey to hell until their exchange earlier, his feelings for the blonde had grown deeper than what was comfortable for him. Because he, of all people, did not ever, EVER, entertain the possibility that he might be gay. And maybe it ached that the object of his desires just went and crushed his tiny kappa heart.

He probably needed to go back to his own room now, but he was still staring at the door Sanzo slammed shut. The damn asshole never failed to torture his thoughts and said asshole was not even aware he was doing it. Gojyo was in deep shit.

* * *

"What are you starin' at Sanzo's face for, Erokappa?"

The next day found Gojyo without any sleep and unable to eat during breakfast. Of course after his realization last night, he had not been able to think of anything else but the monk. And so, it was while he was wondering how a man could have such long lashes hovering above brilliant amethyst eyes that Goku asked his innocent question.

The monk looked up from the coffee he was stirring and focused his gaze on the kappa. Gojyo blinked a little too rapidly as a deer in headlights would. Hakkai, having an idea on what was going on, decided that it was best not to comment. He had observed that Gojyo said nothing at all since they sat down to eat.

"I wasn't, Bakazaru," Gojyo recovered, going back to the piece of meat he had been slicing and dicing into tiny bits since the waitress placed it on the table, "and what were you staring at me for?"

"I wouldn't if you noticed that I ate everythin' from your plate already 'cept for that stuff you're tearing apart!" Goku exclaimed through all the food stuffed in his mouth.

"Urusai!" Sanzo brought down his fan of doom on the saru. "Shut up and finish eating so we could leave already!"

Gojyo would have retorted, he would have told Goku that he was wrong. Except that he couldn't. His plate was almost empty even if he hadn't eaten anything and he had never let the saru get away from stealing his food ever until then. He was just so distracted.

"I'm going for a smoke," Gojyo said, immediately leaving the table.

Ever since his musings last night, he just couldn't stop feeling this longing for the monk anymore! The perpetual hard-on he was sporting these days even added to his list of worries. He lit his stick then took a long, calming drag. Just before he was able to clear his head, however, he felt the blonde's presence beside him.

"Stop being a useless waste of space and give me a light," Sanzo muttered.

Gojyo tried to light his Zippo but his hand was slightly trembling so he just handed it to Sanzo to avoid embarrassing himself. He could not look at the monk after Goku called him out on his slip earlier. Dammit, he was off his game.

Sanzo, however, noticed this and asked, "What the hell's wrong with you?" He took a hit and added, "Wait, don't answer that. There's always something wrong about you."

Gojyo blinked. He would definitely not answer that question. He was also sure that the monk would not appreciate the truth anyway. "It's nothing you'd care about so you can just piss off."

"Ch. Damn right. As long as it doesn't interfere with the mission, I wouldn't give a fuck about what's going on in that perverted brain of yours."

"And _that_ exactly is my problem." Gojyo dropped his half-smoked cigarette and went inside, leaving the confused monk to stare at his retreating back. He was finding it harder and harder to contain himself from blurting out something embarrassing in front of Sanzo. He felt like a fucking pre-adolescent female.

Instead of going back to where the other two were finishing what was left of their breakfast, he went straight to his room to torture himself with even more thoughts of his monk.

* * *

"Sanzo said he wants us to leave in 30 minutes," Hakkai informed Gojyo as he closed the door of their shared room.

For a moment, the hanyou just stared at Hakkai distractedly, then began to gather his stuff. Hakkai observed him out of the corner of his eye while he organized their bag of supplies. "Is there anything you'd like to tell me, Gojyo?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"I guess my real question is, why aren't you doing anything about it?"

"Wha—doing what about what…?" Gojyo tried to feign ignorance.

"Your feelings for Sanzo is what I'm talking about."

Of course Hakkai figured it out. It's _Hakkai_. Gojyo was an idiot for thinking he could get it past him, but he could still try because he just didn't want to talk about it. "I still dunno what you're talking about."

"I know it's not supposed to be my business but I'm worried about you. I've known you for a long time and I've never seen you this depressed."

"What would I get depressed about him over? He's just a repressed, self-absorbed, beautiful son-of-a-bitch." _Beautiful?_ Did that just come out of his mouth? "Ok, let's just say that you're right and I have these… uhm… 'feelings'… for the bouzu. There's nothing I can really do about it which will not get me shot. It's not as if the feeling is mutual."

"Do you remember before this trip when I asked you if I could stay at your house after I was released? Knowing the lifestyle you preferred, I was so sure you'd say no, but you didn't."

"Your point?"

"All I'm saying is that you'll never really know unless you ask. Sanzo is the only one who can say if it's mutual or not. There's always a possibility that you'll get hurt by the answer, but aren't you already hurting now? But I guess, you're right, you might get shot in the process. Again, none of my business. Anyway, I have to go ahead and make sure Hakuryuu's ready."

Gojyo wished Hakkai just didn't open his big mouth. Now, not only was he thinking about the monk 24/7, but he was worrying about how to get through to him, too.

_He thinks I'm a worthless kappa bastard. Either I tell him and get shot, or continue annoying him with stolen glances and still get shot. It's such a win-win situation._

* * *

_Something is definitely bothering the kappa_, Sanzo thought as he passed an inconspicuous glance at Hakuryuu's side mirror for the ninth time that day. The hanyou had been unusually quiet since this morning that he almost missed bringing out his gun to shut both backseat passengers the hell up. Almost. Why he was even thinking about it was a mystery to him. True, he had been inclined to look at Gojyo through the side mirror a bit more during these past few days but that was due to lack of anything else to look at. He was just tired of looking at the road, the trees, the scenery… and NOT because he perhaps probably possibly found Gojyo a wee bit nice to look at. Not at all. Definitely not. And with that thought, he attempted to train his eyes to stay on the road for the remainder of their ride until the next town.

Then he caught Gojyo's fourth sigh that afternoon and did it again. He automatically looked through the side mirror and found that the hanyou had this look of… he could only call it longing, on his face. Maybe he was intrigued by the fact that this is the first time he had seen Gojyo emitting anything other than his carefree aura. Surely, he did not care if the kappa lacked his usual vigor and his… teasing. Did he? That it was probably some problem with the lobby receptionist who was all over Gojyo last night was none of his business. He had no idea why he felt something constrict in his chest at that thought.


	3. Chapter 3

**Title**: What You Are Worth – Chapter 3  
**Author**: namaguza_bouzu  
**Pairing**: Gojyo x Sanzo  
**Rating**: T  
**Warning/s**: OOC. Rating will go up for future chapters. If you are not ready for future NC-17, skip this. Otherwise, step right in.  
**Disclaimer**: Saiyuki is Minekura's.  
**Notes**: I think this is where the actual plot begins. Comments are love.

* * *

The kappa found his opportunity in the hotel they stayed at three days after that conversation with Hakkai. It was just his luck that it had a no smoking rule so he had to go to the roof deck to light a fag. The blonde already beat him to it – he was on his second stick when the redhead got there. He noticed that the bouzu was stripped to just his jeans and black undergarment. Did Sanzo deliberately flaunt his assets to everyone who was willing to look? How the moon softly caressed Sanzo's skin was most fascinating. God, he was breath-taking.

He settled on the floor beside the blonde, careful to observe proper distance from him. They smoked together in silence for a few moments, Gojyo not wanting to disturb the peace, though his heart was beating wildly in his chest. He wondered if the monk could hear it. It was Sanzo who broke the silence.

"Tell me you're out of your funk kappa," Sanzo muttered into the darkness they shared.

Gojyo chose to go for denial. "I'm never in a funk, monk."

"Hn. Is that so?" It wasn't a really question. More like a neutral response to make the kappa forget that he even brought it up in the first place. Sanzo did not really intend to play psychiatrist at that moment.

Gojyo looked up at the sky to prevent himself from staring again but found that the stars were nowhere near as captivating. "Looks like we're gonna have clear skies tomorrow. I've never seen Polaris this bright."

"I never thought of you as a star-gazer."

"I'm not, but you're gonna learn about them when you're living with Hakkai." Gojyo was kinda finding the conversation quite comfortable.

"I wanna know why you were interested about what got me into a funk," Gojyo said, trying not to sound too attentive.

"Who told you I was interested? And you said so yourself, you are never in a funk."

"What if I was? Would you care to know why?"

"Like I said before, if it doesn't interfere with the mission…"

"Yeah. And you also said before that I am a worthless kappa bastard and you need nothing from me."

"So that head of yours does work sometimes."

"Fuck, can you just –" Gojyo let out a long sigh. "But I need something from you."

"What the –? Okay, tell me, but if it's stupid, I'm leaving you here."

"I would follow you, y'know."

With that, Gojyo dropped his cigarette, leaned towards Sanzo and kissed him.

How Sanzo's lips felt in his fantasies paled in comparison to this. They were soft yet unyielding. The bitter taste of Marlboros contrasted with the semi-sweet jasmine tea he consumed during dinner. His hand moved on its own to caress the monk's cheek. The metal cylinder pressed against his chin brought him back to reality.

"What. The. Fuck. Kappa." Sanzo had that glint of murder in his eyes.

Gojyo saw Sanzo's answer in those eyes and had nothing else to do but stand up and leave.

* * *

He, himself, was surprised by what he did. How could he just kiss the bouzu even before any form of warning? What did he even attempt to accomplish? Of course the answer was no! Shit, he felt like a total moron. What pissed him off was the fact that his heart just would not stop throbbing. The rejection felt more powerful than what he expected. He thought he had something for the monk, but he didn't realize it ran this deep.

Gojyo had another sleepless night. He had no idea that the object of his thoughts was suffering the same predicament in the next room.

* * *

Sanzo was on his bed, utterly panicked by what happened on the roof deck half an hour earlier. What was the kappa thinking? Was this a game for him? Wasn't it enough that he chased every female in every town they stopped in? Is this his way of pushing Sanzo to the limits of his patience? Because that could not have been a confession of sorts. It was just impossible, unthinkable and unwelcome. Damn right, unwelcome. And the bastard should know that.

He had been confused by the kappa's actions lately. Sometimes, he felt as if the redhead had been very attentive to his needs, buying his Marlboros for him without him asking, or simply being the one always available everytime he needed someone to cover his back whenever he needed to reload his gun.

Ever since he saw his master fall, he lived his life building all these walls around him. He would not let one idiot kappa break them down. Sanzo would not tolerate the kappa lining him up with those bitches he bedded. The thought that Gojyo was toying with him enraged him. He cannot show him any signs of weakness, of his confusion, or else, the kappa was going to exploit that.


	4. Chapter 4

**Title**: What You Are Worth – Chapter 4  
**Author**: namaguza_bouzu  
**Pairing**: Gojyo x Sanzo  
**Rating**: T  
**Warning/s**: OOC. Fluff. Rating will go up in next chapter. If you are not ready for future NC-17, skip this. Otherwise, step right in.  
**Disclaimer**: Saiyuki is Minekura's.  
**Notes**: Full fluff ahead. You have been warned.

* * *

Two days on the road passed. Neither Gojyo nor Sanzo mentioned anything about that night. In fact, they did not even talk to each other. Heck, the kappa barely talked to anyone at all. He fucked up and Sanzo was never going to forgive him for it.

They reached the next town around late afternoon. Gojyo immediately announced that he was going to scout the bars and might return late.

The town's tavern was not one he would enter if he had any choice. Apparently he hadn't, since it's the only one open. It housed the town's heaviest drunkards and the stench was almost enough to make his eyes water. Not something he couldn't tolerate, though. Gojyo was on his twelfth, no, was it thirteenth? bottle of beer when he figured that it wasn't helping him rid his thoughts of the damn monk. He couldn't just give it up. He scanned the area noting that not one single female was in sight. He found that he was not in the mood anyway. He needed all the booze he can get if he planned to face the monk again.

He then heard a commotion somewhere not far from his place at the bar.

"C'mon you pretty thing, thersh nuthin t'worry 'bout, we jush wanna talk! *Hic* Y'know, get to meet 'at nice ass yah got there."

Some men who had a few drinks too many were persuading someone to leave with them and the other was obviously resisting.

The sound of a fist smacking into a skull was heard and the idiot who "wanted to talk" yelped, "OW! What wuzzat for? Fuck!"

"That was for you being a moron. Get out of my way."

Now that voice stopped Gojyo in the middle of drinking from his fifteenth. No one else in this hole could have a voice as cold and crisp as his monk's.

"You bashtard! Get 'im!"

At that, Gojyo turned to watch but kept his head low.

Sanzo was bereft of his robes and gun, but of course, he was easily winning the battle of fists. There were four burly drunk men surrounding him and he had no problems ducking all their efforts to grab him and landing punches and kicks in all the right places.

When all four were down on the floor, he turned around to look for a table. Suddenly, he was grabbed by two of the idiots who quickly recovered from the blow as he felt a solid kick to his torso. He was spun around and he saw that the moron who spoke was wielding a 9-inch dagger. He struggled to get away but the others were holding him firmly from behind.

"Not so brave now, are ya?" The knife-wielding son-of-a-bitch sneered.

Sanzo saw him raise the blade but it didn't go down as he expected it to because someone was pulling the moron's arm until the dagger fell with a clatter to the ground. He had never been happier to see the kappa.

"It's not fair to use a blade on the unarmed princess here, y'know? And anyway, he's not available for the likes of you." _Neither for the likes of me_, Gojyo thought. He twisted the arm in his grip to emphasize his point before letting go. The drunk, bruised and bloodied bastards, perhaps realizing it was not worth all the trouble, left in a scurry of feet, the two who held Sanzo leaving him to fall on the ground.

Gojyo was beside him in an instant, extending a hand, offering to help him get up but still not meeting his eyes. Sanzo refused the hand but followed him to the bar anyway. He ordered a glass of whiskey and lit a cigarette. Minutes passed without a word from either of them, until –

"Look, Sanzo, what happened that night –"

"Nothing happened, I'm not going to think about it and neither should you. And if you continue playing these games –"

"I'm not playing," Gojyo said finally looking at the monk with intense eyes.

Sanzo didn't know what to make of that. He took a long drag on his smoke. This is not at all how he expected the kappa to behave around him. After that kiss, he thought Gojyo would act bolder and flaunt to everyone that he had kissed the "ice-princess" as he sometimes called him. That would have been easier to handle. All he would have done was pull out his fan – or his gun – once in a while and continue to exchange insults with the kappa. He was not prepared for this. Shit, he had no clue what the kappa meant.

"What do you mean you're not playing. It's your game."

Gojyo took a drag of his own. "Even if you don't want to admit it, it's real for me. And believe me, I've tried to ignore what I'm feeling but I can't keep my heart from choosing you anymore, Sanzo." There. It was out in the open and he could not take it back. He didn't realize that he was gripping his smoke too tightly already while waiting for a response from the monk. Waiting for rejection to hit him a second time.

The monk stayed silent for a moment, deep in thought. He was lost. He was not good at this at all. "Why me?" He asked.

"Hell if I know," was Gojyo's response. He really didn't, aside from the fact that Sanzo was easily the most beautiful person he ever saw.

After the drunken idiots have left, the tavern looked quite empty at that late hour. Gojyo ordered his sixteenth bottle and Sanzo got his fifth glass of whiskey.

"Look, Kappa," the monk started. He wasn't really sure what to think anymore. He knew he should steer clear of Gojyo's advances because there was just no way he could be serious. This was the guy who charmed ladies into his bed more often than the saru saying "harahetta". Well, maybe not, but it was so damn close. But somehow, he felt something was different by the way the redhead said his name. Was… tender… the word for it? Still, he needed to stop this idiocy before it got any worse. For himself. "Unless you are looking for a bullet though that empty head of yours, you'd stop spouting that shit."

"Sanzo…" Gojyo would not even dream that Sanzo would feel the same way for him. "I just need you to give me more time to settle this on my own. I'm sorry that it had to be you. And I'm sorry about that kiss the other night," then he paused. "No, I'm so not sorry about that. And I'd do it again too if only I wouldn't get shot for doing so." The alcohol was probably to be blamed for Gojyo's inability to restrain the words from pouring from his mouth.

The night was so full of surprises. Sanzo did not think Gojyo was sober enough to mean everything he was telling him but he still could not explain why he felt a slight giddy skip in his chest when he heard that the kappa was not giving up on him that easily. _This is getting a bit too dangerous_, he thought. He should ignore the rightness he felt while he was there in Gojyo's presence.

"I'm calling it a night. I would not say anything about this again so you could… what did you call it… settle it on your own?" He placed some bills on the bar and stood, Gojyo following a few steps behind.

Because both of them were distracted by their own thoughts and had more than enough alcohol in their systems, they failed to notice the presence of someone following them while they were walking from the tavern. Gojyo was surprised when he felt a metal pipe hitting his calves with great force thrice that he stumbled forward into Sanzo who was already lying on his side on the ground, arms twisted behind him by men almost twice his size. Gojyo realized that it was their 'friends' who attacked Sanzo earlier that night plus five other companions, nine in total. Normally, this would have been an easy battle but he could not move his legs, let alone, stand, so he remained where he was on the ground.

"What do you want us to do with them, Genma?" A hook-nosed moron who had Sanzo asked the one with the dagger. The bruised Genma was gloating, sure of his success this time. "Hold that fucking bitch down, he needs to pay for the damages he caused."

Gojyo wanted to do a lot of things at that time when he saw the asshole named Genma raise his knife on Sanzo for the second time that night. He wanted to kick the asshole for calling Sanzo a bitch ['coz no one else has the right to do so except him]. He wanted to tell Sanzo more than what he had inside that tavern, there were still a lot of things unsaid. He wanted to stand up and twist the asshole's arm again, tearing it from its socket this time, to stop him from hurting Sanzo. His Sanzo. But at that moment, his feet could not support his weight so he just did what his adrenaline allowed him to do as the blade came down.

He pushed himself from the ground with his hands and flung himself on top of Sanzo.

Sanzo felt the redhead's weight on top of him and the dampness around his middle but there was no pain. As the men scattered and ran off to different directions at the approach of a vehicle, it was then that Sanzo realized what had happened. He sat up and held Gojyo's body carefully, trembling as he saw the wound where the knife struck. It was then that he knew for sure what he meant to the kappa, and surprisingly, what the kappa meant to him. He suddenly understood everything the kappa had said in that tavern and he was tired of running away from it. He was an idiot for realizing it too late. Now, Gojyo was in his arms, all bloody and wounded because of him. Like he needed that to confirm how serious Gojyo was. He was pathetic. He couldn't even stop the wetness from leaking from his eyes onto the kappa's face.

Gojyo lifted a blood-stained hand to wipe a tear from the monk's cheek before he lost consciousness. The sun rose.


	5. Chapter 5

**Title**: What You Are Worth – Chapter 5  
**Author**: **namaguza_bouzu**  
**Pairing**: Gojyo x Sanzo  
**Rating**: NC-17  
**Warning/s**: OOC. LEMON CHAPTER AHEAD. If you are not ready for NC-17, DO NOT PROCEED. Otherwise, step right in.  
**Disclaimer**: Saiyuki is Minekura's.  
**Notes**: COMPLETE. Final chapter: This is where I stored the lemons. This has been edited to suit FFNet's terms. Thanks for staying with me.

* * *

Sanzo was on the chair beside Gojyo's bed as dusk fell. He thanked whoever was watching in the heavens that the vehicle that drove away their attackers last night was Hakuryuu, and in it was Hakkai who went out to look for Sanzo when he found out that the monk had left his gun in his room with his sutra. He had not left that spot since Hakkai finished healing Gojyo and told him that the redhead would be fine after he had rested. He just lost quite an amount of blood.

Gojyo's eyes fluttered open as awareness came to him slowly.

"Took you long enough to wake up. Baka." Sanzo was still trying to mask the worry he felt the whole time Gojyo was asleep.

"Nice to see you too, Bouzu." The idiot kappa was smiling. He must have hit his head too.

"What the hell are you smiling for?"

"I'm glad you're alright."

"You idiot. As I recall, you were the one bleeding all over the place last night."

"Yeah. I'd take it for you and more." That shut Sanzo up. Instead of trying to figure out what to say in response, he leaned over the kappa and pressed his lips onto his giving him a single chaste kiss. He left the room in panic, cursing at himself for acting like a virginal school girl. He reached the door to his own room when he heard the kappa behind him.

"Why the hell did you even wait for me to wake up and kiss me like that if you were just gonna leave right after?" The kappa needed to know.

"Because you said you'd follow." The monk whispered, surprisingly composed, before entering the room.

* * *

As soon as the door closed, Gojyo latched his mouth onto Sanzo's, showing him how to properly kiss. And Sanzo was a very fast learner. The redhead took his time in savoring Sanzo's taste, his flavor, his breath. His heart was pounding so rapidly he was so sure it would burst from his chest. He brought his hands down from where they was caressing Sanzo's cheeks to glide down his back, lifting a bit of his shirt up to tease the skin underneath while moving his lips to suck on his jaw.

Sanzo was overwhelmed by the sensations Gojyo was making him feel. He couldn't contain the moan that left him as his neck was attacked by those sinful lips so he moved to expose more of his skin to the kappa, his arms encircling tan neck. His pants were already so uncomfortably tight and Gojyo was not helping by pressing their hips together. When Gojyo gave an experimental thrust, Sanzo let out a pathetic whimper. He realized that at that point, nothing else mattered except that he needed more of these: tan hands inching up his pale flesh, pliant smirking lips against his own, fine red hair flowing through his hands, and those hips insistently grinding on his…

"Dammit, Kappa… more…"

Sanzo needed more and Gojyo was very willing to deliver. He relieved Sanzo of his jeans, _nice, no underwear_, and effortlessly removed his own clothing. Soon, there was nothing but just Gojyo's bandages between them. He continued sucking at the monk's pale neck as if he was a thirsty man who just found an oasis. The little noises coming from the monk indicated that what he was doing was much appreciated. Gojyo figured that they would have to move to the bed or his legs are gonna give out. The monk yelped when he grabbed both pale thighs and wrapped them around his hips, the bouzu pressed against Gojyo's abs.

"What the fuck –?" Sanzo exclaimed as Gojyo carried him and laid him on the bed. He forgot to continue protesting as soon as he felt a moist tongue swipe against his nipple.

Gojyo sucked on the nipple, totally enjoying the gasps he could hear from Sanzo, while letting his hands fondle the other. Sanzo's fingers combing through his hair felt absolutely wonderful. He looked at the monk's dazed eyes and was overwhelmed by the need to kiss him senseless, and so he did. No woman ever made him feel better than this.

Sanzo welcomed the warm mouth and the tongue dancing with his. His senses were exploited, one after the other. He was already lost in Gojyo's kisses when he felt a hand stroking him between his legs.

"Ahhhh… Gojyo!" He screamed.

Gojyo left his lips and proceeded to go down, leaving licks and kisses on his way, until he was almost kissing Sanzo's arousal. Sanzo's eyes went wide as he watched Gojyo take him fully in his mouth. His hands gripped red hair tightly, he was pulsing in Gojyo's mouth as the hanyou licked and sucked with all the passion he felt for the monk.

"Gojyo, I think I'm ready," Sanzo said, not able to hide the blush that crept to his cheeks. He was such a fucking virgin.

"Are you sure about this?" Gojyo had to ask. After all, he did not take anyone who wasn't willing. Especially not his bouzu, who, he was sure, had never done anything remotely similar to this before.

Sanzo was losing his patience and he needed MORE. NOW! "Just get the fuck on with it! If you are chickening out after all that you've done here, I'm really gonna put a bullet thr—"

"Alright, alright!" Gojyo almost laughed. His eyes raked over Sanzo on the bed, wanton, waiting and so ready for him. It was a first for both of them but when his hungry ruby eyes met half-lidded amethyst ones, all his hesitations went out the window. He realized that this beautiful being was letting him, the worthless kappa bastard, be his first and it thrilled him like no other. This was infinitely better than his wildest dreams.

He saw the bottle of oil the monk used to carry along for cleaning purposes on the bedside table. _This would have to do_, he thought. He covered his fingers with the oil and urged Sanzo to open his legs. He coated his entrance before slowly inserting one finger in. Seeing that the monk was showing no signs of pain, he inserted another one. Sanzo winced slightly so he waited a few seconds before moving them to stretch him. Feeling the monk's warmth around his finger was making him almost dizzy with lust but he knew he had to prepare Sanzo thoroughly if he wanted this to be a great experience for him. When he saw that the monk was ready, he removed his fingers and positioned himself above Sanzo.

"This is gonna hurt at first…"

"I know that. Just do it." Sanzo shut his eyes as the kappa moved slowly inside him. He almost screamed in pain when the head went inside him, but the blonde chose to bite his shoulder instead.

"Shh… you need to relax. God, you're so tight." Gojyo was trying his damn hardest not to pound Sanzo into the mattress. As soon as he felt Sanzo relax around him, he inched deeper until he was fully inside Sanzo. The first thrusts were slow, he made sure that Sanzo had adjusted already before he changed his angle. When he did, he knew he had touched that sweet spot when Sanzo's hips gave a huge lurch and he felt the monk's hands grip his arms as if he was holding on for dear life.

"Ohh… fuck! What was that? Gojyo!"

At that, Gojyo was undone. He pounded through his blonde with abandon, hitting that spot over and over again until the monk saw stars, Sanzo's whimpers giving him all the encouragement he needed. He stroked Sanzo in time with his thrusts. Sanzo frantically grasped Gojyo's shoulder for purchase. When both of them could not even distinguish themselves from the other, not that it mattered anyway, they went through the explosive, mind-blowing ecstacy that neither of them was going to forget for the rest of their lives.

Gojyo collapsed on top of Sanzo, neither of them wanting, nor having the energy, to move.

"Shit. Sanzo. That was… amazing."

"I know."

They stayed there, in each other's arms, both thinking of the possibilities of what this – what happened between them tonight – may bring.

"Sanzo… I…" Gojyo could not bring himself to continue for fear of frightening the blond with his emotions again. Instead, he tightened his hold around Sanzo's waist and shook his head. "I would take more of these for you, y'know," the kappa whispered, touching his bandages lightly.

Minutes passed in silence but just when Gojyo thought the monk had already fallen asleep, he heard the words, "I love you too, you damn kappa. See you in the morning."

Gojyo, with an idiotic smile on his face, was again, not able to catch sleep until morning came… but this time, for a much better reason.

_End_

* * *

**Additional Notes**:

**_Thanks for reading up to here. I hope you somehow enjoyed the ride. If you are interested to read the uncensored version [rated MA / NC-17], you can visit my LJ which can be found in my profile page. Feedback, comments and criticisms are much appreciated._**


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